#s

January 6, 2015

24 – and before is not anymore

25 – its strange & good to be alive
26 – seeing things that need a fix
27 – bills for pills and therapy sessions
28 – accept it all as a trick of fate
29 – would make a change if there was time
the big three zero – over trying to be a hero
31 – a little addition & adulthood has really begun
32 – duty is what there is to do
33 – the balance of circumstance and biology is reality
34 – scrape the edges, look for more
35 – still searching for the drive
36 – sick and tired of being tired and sick; the cliché sticks
37 – don’t worry much about hell or heaven
38 – a bit to soon for it to be too late
39 – and no one wants to hear me whine

but this year I’m 40.

still sad, stuck and silly.

Advertisements

7 Responses to “#s”

  1. Bareknuckle Says:

    I love you, Shawn. I like the progression of this piece. I don’t think I can remember the years with the clarity and specifics that you do. “A bit too soon for it to be too late….” I like this line…..

  2. Lindsey Says:

    Forty rhymes with snorty. Shorty. Sortie? Cavort-y? Good Lortie. How did we get this old?

  3. Joe Says:

    Reading this helped me contextualize the way I’ve been feeling lately. Don’t let the words “midlife crisis” and their image of a 45 year old yuppie buying a Porsche turn you off. I think it’s relevant to anyone going through middle age.

    http://m.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2014/12/the-real-roots-of-midlife-crisis/382235/

    It’s too long though. Basically you can read the first section and look at the chart at the end.

  4. Joe Says:

    (The upshot is everyone is happier when they are young and when they are old. So I’ve decided to see if I can adopt the perspective of someone in their 50s-60s now, to get that 50s-60s happiness, rather than bemoaning that I can no longer take the perspective of someone in their 30s)


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s